The De-commisioning of a Water Bed

I know this blog is meant to be based on travel ,food, adventure etc but sometimes life’s challenges come closer to home. Today we received a reminder to add conditioner to our water-bed but sadly it is no more.

When we bought it many years ago it was a great help with allergy problems.Its gentle lapping motion rocked me to sleep, we never had to cope with a cold bed and we were very happy with it.Recently things have changed…. while travelling we felt safer turning off the heater.This made the bed unusable on our return, a bit like sleeping on a cold hot water bottle. Water seemed to evaporate from within to be replaced by air and the rubber container bag seemed to have stretched.The result was a gentle movement by husband caused a Tsunami that threatened to catapult me out of bed…… it had to go!

Now when we had it delivered it seemed to take a whole day to get it installed and a couple of days to settle before use.We were warned adjustment or dismantling it would need professional help.

“Phoooey says my husband,”simple physics and a garden hose will sort that out”

My role is always the one who reluctantly holds the ladder/rope/or in this case pipe.So there I was keeping the end of the garden hose at the correct angle and depth to syphon off the water from the bed into the bath in the ensuite.As you know I am not one for long-term concentrated effort, I do tend to drift or get distracted.Suffice it to say on several occasions a certain amount of mopping was necessary.In fact we got through most of the contents of the airing cupboard.

Finally in frustration my husband decided we could man-handle the little water left in the bag to drain in the bath.Well we got it onto the floor where I collapsed in giggles and announced he needed a man to help him with this particular handling.Fortunately our son called round and the two men got rid of the last of the water.The bed was dismantled into its constituent parts and loaded into the family people mover.It took three circuits of the municipal recycling depot to figure out which skip each of our bits of base/frame/ bag qualified for.

Exhausted we got home for a night in the spare room.At 8-00am the next morning our new bed was delivered .1200 individual pocket springs and a generous layer of hi-tech memory foam. (  I take my beds very seriously !) All this at a bargain price in the January sales.It looked fabulous but remember the house is full of soggy towels and linen so I decided to splash out on new bedding.

That night the bed looked like an illustration for the fairy story ‘The Princess and the Pea.’I practically needed a ladder to climb in…. bliss.No rocking just firm gentle support and no problem falling asleep.Sadly I awoke from a nightmare that I was being massaged by a fine grain sandpaper (another DIY experience that haunts me).It got worse , every inch of my skin seemed on fire.Then I realised in my haste I had not pre-washed the sheets and was having an allergic reaction to the starch/finishing product on them.At 3-00am we had to strip the bed and hunt for a mismatch of dry sheets in the depleted airing cupboard.

We have offered to help our son move house to save him money  . Maybe after recent experience we should just call the professionals.


One response to “The De-commisioning of a Water Bed

  1. Sounds like an except from Laurel & Hardy; Wish I’d been a fly on the :))

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